In the first piece of our Modern Motherhood series, we talk with Zeenat Wilkinson , Mum to Zayn & Aaliyah. From embracing life’s chaos & embracing presentness to prioritising family traditions, Zeenat shares with us what keeps her grounded.
What are you proudest of so far on your motherhood journey?
Life has a weird way of surprising us in the best and most chaotic ways, testing our patience as well as resilience. I had to learn to embrace letting go. This gentle nudge and a shift in perspective has helped me understand that things can unravel but in the grand scheme of things, the smaller challenges should never overshadow the bigger and more important things that hold importance in life - family, good health and community. I am proud of myself for coming this far. Motherhood has been grounding in the best way possible.
What is something that you’ve found challenging about parenthood in this day and age?
In some cultures and societies around the world, there is a sense of the newborn mother. A mother is born at the same time as a baby. Modern day motherhood of doing it all, juggling a thousand things, as well as terms such as “supermums” are set to fail mums. The lack of support for new mums is very evident and there isn't enough support out there for mums to find a sense of self outside of motherhood during those early days. Raising children is messy and hard, this idea of perfection in motherhood is failing mothers, especially with social media. I hope there is more transparency around the challenges of parenting in real life as well as on social platforms.
Is there something that you know now, that you wish you knew earlier?
Trust your instincts. I truly believe in an intuitive approach to parenting. It’s good to learn as much as you can but then follow your own instincts and create a system that works for your family. You know what’s best for your child and family.
Is there anything from your childhood that you’re trying to make sure that you build into your children’s?
I have so many fond memories from these wonderful dinner parties so celebrations and birthdays are really important for us. We always have friends and family over for gatherings. I also loved all the little getaways we did as a family when I was a child, so traveling as a family is really important to us.
What’s the biggest lesson that you have learnt from your children?
I am constantly learning from them. We live extremely distracted lives and learning to put my devices away and staying present has been great for my mental health. All they need is our time and undivided attention and it seems easier said than done when you have a long list of chores and work emails piling up but being present has been great for all of us.
What's your number one Mum must have?
A good coffee machine! I have a Nespresso machine and there is nothing better than a beautiful cuppa in the comfort of your home to start your day.
